The only thing better than a good maker was a good staker in this week's episode, where we followed Bill and Eric back to Bon Temps, witnessed Tara's first real feeding, watched Sookie drink all the liquor and were treated to the first (but probably not last) staking of the season. What went down during last night's "True Blood"? Here's the full bleed.
Wakeups, Breakups, Makeups
Tara's attempts to deep-fry herself in a tanning bed last as long as it takes for Pam to show up and command her to stop—not because she cares, you know, but she can only take so much of her makee's screaming over their psychic connection. But after being treated to two flashbacks' worth of Pam crying bloody tears over her remembered origins, we know she's got a heart hidden somewhere under her pink velour sweatsuit, and lo and behold, it makes an appearance again in this episode; after sobbing her way through a confrontation with Eric over the whereabouts of one Russell Edgington, she calls his bluff. If he doesn't trust her, she says, "then release me and get it over with."
Which, in a tender moment of selfless sadness the next morning, he does—not out of spite, but in the hopes of ensuring her safety and the survival of their bloodline. And whether it's Eric's lesson by example or her own maternal instincts kicking in, the freed Pam is inspired to school her own reluctant progeny in the finer points of feeding from live human beings. Are Tara's brief days of pious Tru Blood-drinking over before they even began? She'll let you know when her mouth isn't full.
Guilty, Party of Two
Meanwhile, we've been waiting forever to see Lafayette deliver that "angel of death" line so often teased in this season's trailers, and at last, here it is: furious at Sook for spilling the beans about Debbie's murder, he lets her have it. And so does everyone else, albeit not out loud; telepathic Sookie can't help overhearing everyone's angry unspoken judgments about what she did to Tara, and rides the tidal wave of guilt all the way to Jason's house, where she begs to be arrested.
"I ruin people's lives!" she sobs. (Um, yeah? Why do you think we watch this soap opera week after week? Apart from getting to see Eric Northman naked, I mean.)
Fortunately for Sookie (and the rest of us, 'cause this "I shot Debbie" sobfest is getting a leetle bit tired), Jason won't arrest her and Alcide doesn't give her a well-deserved hanging-out-to-dry. Instead, he visits Mr. and Mrs. Pelt and tells them the, uh, truth: Debbie is dead, and Marcus Bozeman killed her. But don't worry, 'cause Alcide killed him! See how nicely that works out? Now go on home, Pelts, and take your ridiculous fur-related surname with you.
And for Alcide, it's off to Chez Stackhouse, where nothing gets you in good with your crush like telling her that she won't be going to prison for murder...and where he can maybe finally seal the deal with Sookie whilst the rest of us ponder Lafayette's peculiar new ability to levitate cars and make them try to kill people.
So Stake Me Maybe
Fortunately, not every plot arc from this episode remained an unanswered question: for instance, back at Authority headquarters, Nora finally cracks and gives up the name of the itty-bitty traitor within their ranks. And before you can say "You're in time out," the baby Justin Bieber Chancellor gets a staking. (No problem here; that kid was creeping me out.)
And speaking of answers, Terry Bellefleur's PTSD conveniently explains why he and Devins are hot on the trail of their rogue former army buddy: namely, hothead Marines + angry civilians + enough hallucinogenic pixie dust to make an elephant trip balls = a pile of dead bodies. So it's not all cliffhangers and mystery 'round here!
...Well, except for the part where Terry and Devins are staring down the barrel of an unhinged man's gun and being asked if "anything" followed them there. And the part where Sam's shifter pals are inexplicably murdered. And the part where nobody knows who exhumed Russell Edgington. And, of course, the part where Jason Stackhouse runs into Cousin Hadley at a faerie rave, and gets glow-blasted in the face by angry Fae bouncers, and oh, by the way, vampires killed your parents. But apart from that, we're totally on top of it. Yep.
What did you think of last night's "True Blood"? Sound off in the comments and on Twitter!